I Put My New Shoes On and Everything's Gonna Be Alright

It's beautiful outside and here I am with self imposed imprisonment inside this tiny hotel room in downtown Chicago.  I'd promised Kbear that I'd search heaven and earth endlessly for the perfect package of blue pretend food that you'd have to tear the edge off to release a powder substance that would have to be mixed with water in order to feed her hungry needy babies.  They really need it.  It's only 6:30 and I haven't even spied one NATO protestor in two days of walking back and forth from my conference to my hotel.  There is this feeling of having my tail between my legs today that keeps me from being more adventurous this evening.  It started this morning when I missed the 7am alarm and didn't have enough time to wash my hair.  It's partly from my over expanded breasts badly in need of a good pump.  Pumping helps relieve pressure and avoid embarrassing glances from men who have no concept of nursing mothers.  Perhaps there is a tiny bit to do with today's questionable wardrobe choices.  I've also been really dissappointed with the quality of the local food and am afraid of further disappointment if I decide to go on a culinary hunt for good pastry tonight.  Mostly, there is this feeling of not fitting in.  Having lived in Sheboygan for now going 7 years, I've become Sheboyganized.  There is this inner desire for things that are small, more local, affordable, within reach.  And yet, I reject that same sentiment from my core constantly.  Even now.  I'm so confused.  Perhaps it's better just to make a decision at this point and stick with it.  It's 6:38 p.m.  Gonna put on my walking shoes.